An Ode to the Dark Mixer

Ben Shipley, Olivia, Guest, and Simon McGoram. Photo from Daniella Alhadeff on Eat Drink Play

 In the house of Secretary Macleay,

Did braggarts come to bray,

Of a new dark mixer,

Known simply as the 'Elxir'.

To a Victorian era transported,

Guests behaved with fine deportment.

Even with potent potables aplenty,

They still managed to behave like gentry.

But what of this mixer,

The aforementioned elixir?

With the finest ingredients of the colonies,

There was no need for hyperboles.

Caramel, vanilla, chocolate and coffee,

These enticing flavours will not be found in the offy.

An only on-premise potion,

Who could think of such a notion?

Why Schweppes who supplied the Empire with tonic,

Are the ones responsible for this frolic.

Festooned with top hats, gloves and canes,

The 'tenders continued to feed us Batangas for our pains.

With ruddy cheeks and tales tall,

Arrant boasts were made to all.

From gentleman to cads did one see us fall;

We weren't roguish knaves before this ball.

Arising early on the morrow,

Surprised to not find heads filled with pain and sorrow, 

The 'Elixir Batanga' was proclaimed a cure -

A proven panacea with a dark allure.

The Elixir Batanga 

3/4 pony (45ml) Jose Cuervo Tradicional Reposado Tequila
Schweppes Elixir
Orange wedges
Black pepper salt rim

Build in a fancy bar glass rimmed with black pepper salt and filled with chipped ice. Squeeze an orange wedge or two over your concoction, raise a toast to the Queen and the glory of the British Empire then enjoy.